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a man who is being told how to discuss a vasectomy with his spouse

Discussing a Vasectomy with Your Spouse

Discussing a vasectomy with your spouse can be an awkward conversation, but if you’re worried about having more children then it’s one that needs to take place. There’s no “right” way to go about discussing the subject, but here are a few tips for making the talk go as smoothly as possible.

Be honest.

Bringing up a vasectomy can be a touchy subject for both men and women, but it’s important that your conversations about them be open and honest. If you have any reservations about the procedure, don’t simply try to mask your discomfort for the sake of your spouse—in the long run that will do more damage than good.

Give each other some time to think.

Deciding on a vasectomy is something that probably shouldn’t take place after only one conversation. Instead, bring up the subject and then give one another some time to think it over privately before making any final decisions. This alone time will allow you both to collect your thoughts and decide where you stand without having to worry about influencing or being influenced by the other. Once you’ve had some time to ponder, reconvene and share your reflections on a vasectomy.

Consider alternatives.

There are lots of birth control options out there, and a vasectomy is only one option to consider. While it may ultimately end up being the most logical choice for you and your spouse, it never hurts to see what alternatives are available as well. Creating a pro-and-con list of all your options is a good way to see how vasectomies stack up against the rest, such as tubectomies.

Be understanding.

A vasectomy can be a big deal for men—and women too—so be patient with your spouse if you don’t get the reaction to the suggestion you were hoping for. Just because someone is initially opposed to the procedure doesn’t mean you can’t convince them, but if you aren’t sympathetic to the concerns and fears of your spouse, you may not get very far at all.

Last Updated: June 29, 2017