No matter how wonderful your new baby is, she’s going to cry. Sometimes you can totally fix that with a little milk or a clean diaper. Sometimes, you may feel like pulling your hair out 45 minutes after she started. Dr. Harvey Karp, a pediatrician, developed the 5 S’s for soothing crying babies -- and frazzled parents. You can get the full rundown from Dr. Karp’s book or DVD Happiest Baby on the Block, but here’s the skinny on a method revered by every parent that’s tried it.
Why Do Newborns Cry So Much?
Many experts refer to a baby’s first few months of life as the “fourth trimester.” Coming from the dark, warm, soothing environment of the womb and into the harsh reality of the world is quite a change for a newborn, and these changes can take some getting used to. Dr. Karp’s method makes use of those things that make the womb such a tranquil environment -- the sensation of being completely wrapped up and warm, the consistent white noise of the mother’s body, Mom’s gentle rocking Mom’s, and the sucking reflex that begins around the 32nd week of pregnancy. After about four months, these methods tend to become less effective. Initially, however, when done correctly, Dr. Karp reports a 98% success rate. If your baby does not respond to the 5 S’s or cries more than normal, talk to your pediatrician.
1: Swaddle
To recreate the feeling of being enclosed in the womb, try swaddling your newborn. You can buy premade Swaddlers, like these, or you can use an ordinary baby or receiving blanket (stick to lighter materials if your baby needs the comfort of swaddling without the warmth of a heavy blanket).
Turn your baby’s blanket 45 degrees (so it is a diamond, not a square). Fold the top corner down a few inches to create a flat edge that won’t flop over the head or face. Lay Baby with the flat corner behind the neck with their toes pointing toward the opposite corner. Place Baby’s right arms straight against her body, pull the right corner over Baby, and tuck it tightly (not squished, but firm) under the back or bottom. Place the left arm flat to her side, then pull the bottom corner up to her shoulder. Grab your remaining right corner and wrap it over and behind Baby so all the blanket corner and Baby’s limbs are securely positioned.
2: Side or Stomach
For some rare and miraculous babies, swaddling is sufficient, but most babies need a little more. Once Baby is nicely swaddled, lay him on his side or stomach. Most babies prefer this position on a lap, across a chest, or in a pair of arms. Although the side or stomach is more soothing for him, it’s important never to use this position for a sleeping baby. The best sleeping position for newborns is on their back; experts report this reduces the risk of SIDS.
3: Shush
Still not happy? Try “shush”ing your little one once he’s comfy and cozy. Again, your baby is used to being able to hear the gentle susurrations of the maternal body, so total silence can be a little disconcerting just as all those extra noises can be a little overwhelming for brand new sensory processing. Put your mouth close to Baby’s ear and make a nice, loud “SHHHH” sound. You don’t have to be quiet -- your little one has to hear you over her his own squalling. However, do get quieter as Baby does. If you’re running out of breath getting Baby to sleep on his own, use white noises -- the more rumbly, the better, according to Dr. Karp.
4: Swing
If you and Baby are still freaking out, that’s okay. Try creating a gentle bouncing or swinging sensation to mimic the feeling of being in the womb. Imagine bobbing about in amniotic fluid while Mom is walking around. Rocking a bassinet or using a baby swing can be a great way to reproduce this (make sure to fasten the safety belt over baby, swaddling, and all), but the more upset the baby, the more jiggling she needs. Plus, some babies appreciate the reassuring touch of another human.
If you’re holding her, jiggle Baby gently in your arms; if she’s across your lap, lift your heels up and down like horse hooves. Just make sure to support that fragile head and neck, and never, never, never shake your baby -- this can cause severe, permanent damage.
5: Suck
If you’re still struggling, give Baby something to initiate their sucking reflex. For breastfeeding moms, lactation experts generally recommend a six week grace period before using any kind of alternative nipple, including bottles and pacifiers, so your newborn doesn’t get confused about how to latch and suck. However, if you are struggling to calm baby (and stay sane), remember that this is your choice. Pacifiers are safe for sleeping and may even reduce the risk of SIDS, and suckling can be extremely soothing for many babies. If you opt against pacifiers, you can use the tip of your finger or thumb.
