Nocturnal enuresis is the involuntary release of urine by a child while sleeping and refers more specifically to children who are of an age to be past wetting the bed. This doesn’t mean the child is abnormal, but it can be indicative of something else going on. And while it isn’t uncommon to wonder what is causing the bedwetting, what is equally important to consider is -- what is the bedwetting causing?
Self Esteem Issues
Bedwetting may be frustrating for you as a parent, but it can be equally frustrating for your child -- not to mention embarrassing. And while research hasn’t necessarily proved that bedwetting causes low self-esteem, there is a definite correlation between the two. Imagine wetting the bed at a sleepover. Children can be extremely cruel to each other. This can be impacted immensely by parents who blame the child for his or her nocturnal enuresis rather than providing a supportive environment to help them get through this stage. Furthermore, many children refrain from attending social engagements that require spending the night with other children, leading to feelings of ostracization and isolation that can lower self-esteem. Another significant factor can be feeling like a failure if repeated attempts at treatment are unsuccessful.
More Bedwetting
Secondary bedwetting refers to bedwetting that has ceased for at least six months and then begins again. This type of nocturnal enuresis often has an anatomical issue behind it, but stress can be a major impact as well. Physical or sexual abuse, a combative home life, or major changes in the home (deaths, births, divorce, etc) can all put severe stress on the children of the household -- significant stress can consequently induce secondary bedwetting. Between the initial stressors, the reinstated bedwetting, and the potential hostility directed at the child because of the bedwetting, a vicious cycle can form leading to not only secondary nocturnal enuresis but behavioral and developmental issues as well. These things often interwork to cause a lot of distress and misbehavior in children. If home life is strong and supportive, talk to your child’s teacher about what’s going on at school. Feeling free to talk about what’s going wrong for them (no friends, a bully, etc) can go a long way towards alleviating bedwetting.
Family Feud
While the family can put stress on the child because of bedwetting, the child’s bedwetting can put stress on the household as well. Midnight wakes for sheet changes, extra laundry, continuing to purchase diapers, etc. -- all of this adds up to less sleep, more work, and more money. Additionally, punishing the child for wetting the bed will not only increase bedwetting but increase feelings of shame and worthlessness. All of this has an impact on the people around the child, increasing stress in the household. Insufficient sleep can make cranky parents who punish not only the enuretic child, but also other children in the household for minor mistakes more harshly than they might in a better mood. Maintaining calm and finding positive ways to manage the bedwetting can make a huge difference -- a happier household means more well-adjusted children, which means less bedwetting.
